Understanding Your Triggers: Steps to Emotional Healing

Emotional Triggers are like sudden waves– you don't always see them coming, but when they hit, they can knock the wind out of you. They're those moments when a simple comment, a familiar smell, or even a certain song stirs somethings deep within, leaving you anxious, angry, or overwhelmed. I know this feeling all too well.

As busy young adult, life often feels like a constant balance act– juggling work deadlines, school assignments, and personal relationships. There have been days when a small critique from a boss or an unanswered text from a friend sent me spiraling. It wasn't just about that moment– it was about everything it reminded me of. Recognizing and understanding these emotional triggers is a crucial step toward healing and growth. So, let's walk this path together– here's how you can start untangling those emotional knots.

1. Recognize your Triggers

Awareness is the first step. You can't heal what you don't acknowledge. Triggers often stem from unresolved emotions or past experiences, and they tend to surface when we least expect it.

My Personal Tip: I started using a digital journal because it's easily accessible and more private. Whenever I felt a sudden rush of emotion– whether it was frustration or sadness, I jotted down what happen and how I felt. Over time, I noticed patterns– certain words or situations that seemed to pull me back to past wounds.

Actionable Steps:

• Keep a digital journal or use a notes app on your phone to record moments when you feel an intense emotional shift.

  
  

• Look for recurring patterns– what situations, words, or environments seem to set off those feelings?

2. Explore the Root Cause

Once you spot the patterns, it's time to dive deeper. It's not easy, but asking yourself the hard questions can reveal the hidden wounds behind your triggers.

Real Moment: I once found myself feeling an unexpected wave of anger when a coworker dismissed my work done on a project and tried to take credit during a meeting. It seemed minor, but deep down, it reminded me of moments in my childhood when my hard work was brushed aside, making me feel taken for granted. Recognizing this link helped me realize that my strong reaction wasn't just about the meeting–it was tied to an old feeling of not being heard.

Actionable Steps:

• Ask yourself, "Why did this situation upset me?"

• Reflect on whether the trigger mirrors a past experience where you felt hurt or invalidated.

3. Validate Your Emotions

Here's the truth– your feelings are valid, even if others don't understand them. You're not "too sensitive" or "overreacting." These emotions don't define me– they're just passing through."

Actionable Steps:

• Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your feelings without judgement.

  
  

• Use affirmations like, "I am allowed to feel this way, and I am working through it."

4. Develop Healthy Coping Mechanisms

Understanding your triggers is powerful, but having a plan for how to cope when they arise is just as important. It's about responding, not reacting.

Personal Strategy: When I feel a trigger building up, I turn to deep breathing– four seconds in, hold for four, and exhale for four. It's simple but effective. If I'm at work or school, I excuse myself for a quick walk outside to reset.

Actionable Steps:

• Practice deep breathing exercises or grounding techniques.

• Find comforting activities– listen to music, doodle, or stretch–to break the emotional wave.

5. Set Boundaries

Not everyone or every situation deserves access to your emotional space. Setting boundaries isn't about pushing people away– it's about protecting your peace.

Lesson Learned: I used to overextend myself, thinking I had to please everyone. But now, I clearly communicate when I need space or when I can't take on more. It's not easy, but it's necessary.

Actionable Steps:

• Have honest conversations about your limits with family, friends, and coworkers.

• If certain environments consistently trigger you, step back and reassess how you engage with them.

Healing is not linear– it's a journey of self discovery, with ups and downs. There will be days when you feel strong and others when the weight feels heavier. However, every time you recognize a trigger, pause, and choose how to respond, you're making progress. You're rewriting your story, one moment at a time.

You're not alone in this. I'm walking this road with you– learning, healing, and growing.

If you're looking for a simple, private way to start tracking your triggers and emotions, check out my Digital Anxiety Planner ( https://www.jvellieempatheticwave.com/product-page/anxiety-planner )– designed to be both accessible and secure for your journey.

Let's continue this journey together! Follow me on Instagram at [@jvellie_empathetic_wave]

(https://www.instagram.com/jvellie_empathetic_wave) for daily emotional wellness tips, relatable content, and a supportive community of young adults navigating life's ups and downs. Let's build a space where we can heal and thrive together.